Do you always say yes to everyone?

Is it hard to say no when someone asks you to do something?

Have you established healthy boundaries with the people in your life?

Take a few minutes to think about your relationships and whether or not there are healthy boundaries in place or if you typically succumb to people’s requests and demands.

This quote by Dr. Henry Cloud, Dr. John Townsend is perfect for anyone who tends to give in more often than not to family and friends’ requests no matter what it is. In addition, once you say yes to something you are not comfortable doing or committing to, it becomes more and more difficult to say no.

It can be hard to say no to people you care about. You want to be able to help others if you can but it is important to make sure that you maintain your own identity and life, which includes pursing your goals, hobbies, self-nourishment, etc.

For me, saying no, especially in relationships, became extremely challenging because once I failed to set that healthy boundary,  I was expected to comply every time. Trying to setting that “no” boundary after saying yes the first time is like trying to dig a hole in frozen ground. It just does not happen, at least not with ease.

One of the key factors I allowed this to happen was that I was a people pleaser looking for my happiness from the external as opposed to looking within. The problem with that is when you constantly give in to please others you give up all of your personal power, you give up your identity, and that happiness you were initially looking for never appears.

You lose connection with your own existence. Everyone else’s needs become your own.

Remember, no one is going to take care of you other than you so it is vital that you develop a comfort level of saying no to people. If someone gets mad or offended then that is on them, not you. Your life is just as important as everyone else’s life.

Now before you go off and just start shouting NO at everyone, take a second and recognize that I am not advocating no longer helping people. I mean, we all live on this big blue orb together. It is together that we become stronger individuals.

However, setting boundaries is critical in maintaining your own existence rather than relying on others to fill that void. Find a balance in helping others, as well as helping yourself, and know that it is ok to put yourself first at times.

Now it’s your turn.

How does this quote inspire you?

Tell me about an experience where a failure to set healthy boundaries led you to cave in to numerous demands and requests of others. How did it feel? Were you able to establish a healthy boundary moving forward or are you still struggling with that?

Contact me or share your thoughts below in the Comments section.

Let’s get the discussion going.

Remember, you are not alone on this journey. Together we can become stronger individuals.

Educate. Engage. Evolve.